Photo by Dave Adamson on Unsplash

Half Time

Entering phase II, the liminal space, discomfort amplified

Grateful for the graciousness received by others, plying my craft to give

Harnessing new images of success, deleting the old operating system

Installing new software, new outlooks, new screens, and systems

Changing and adapting, softening the edges, sharping the focus

Stepping back, gaining perspective, relaxing the attachments

Learning and growing, modifying and adapting, savoring the innovation

Embracing changes, unifying fears into excitement, releasing the old

Humility sought, laughter applied, at the old way, the old habits

Habitual thoughts of more, of needing, of wanting, of measuring up

And learning, through emotional pain and toil, those attachments were illusions

Illusions of grandeur, false stories, make-believe fantastic gluttony

Grandiosity of braggadocio, soul sickness of micro traumas, a world where I didn’t conform

The glove didn’t fit, acquitting me from life’s responsibilities

Pandora’s Box of limitless candies, I grabbed your share too

Awash in the success of money and status, glittering gold for the taking

Winning and achieving, succeeding and obtaining, the glass emptying all the while

Finding nothingness and amassing, amassing nothing while purchasing

Emptiness the disease, requiring more to fill the void, grasping and getting

Phoenix rising, crashing, burning, depleting, despondent, deteriorating

Gun in hand, gun in mouth, cocaine the salve for the wounded heart

No cure, no more, unable to continue, the tide sweeping beyond the shore

Spontaneous combustion, hysterical performance, opaque irrationality of crazy

And epiphanies galore, glorious understanding, universal freedoms

Blessings applied, unwavering grace, understanding from the confused

And liminality delivered, like Amazon to the doorstep, the new package arrived

Mindset and perception, wholeness anew, tranquility in chaos

Grateful, blessed, patient, calm, happy, joyful, compassionate, and free

Words I knew but never felt, now installed into the new operating system,

Shay 2.0, the new version, improved, a shell filled with redesigned philosophies

Running on new power, new perceptions, new understanding

Delivering more results, still burning, the fire alive as always

But more directed and purposed, definitive in desire to help, to give

Less for me, more for others. Giving rather than taking, achieving peace while releasing old ideologies

The second half is beginning, year 30 of a career, praying for 30 more, slow down at 80. Maybe.

No end in site, deleting any thought of stopping, retrenching and rolling

Too excited, too curious, infatuated and wondering, in awe of what’s coming

Careers to build and rebuild, hands to feed, people to help, change to make

No more setting in the sun, no permanent lounging by the pool

I need my personal time, nature of abundance, but this brain is on fire

The man is burning, change is happening, and peace comes through the giving

And through the release, release of the things, the things that don’t matter. The things that claim importance and control, letting go, and embracing a new destiny. One without the false anchors of comfort. Giving in to the evolution, stepping into unknown, and searching for the silence of joy. Each moment, each day, it’s there. Beyond the usual, finding the atypical, greeting changes with open arms.

The second half.